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Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Day 4: Can We Talk?

The Horoscope Project

Day 4: Can We Talk?

A discussion is in your future. Allow your mind to drift to better times. That didn’t sound good. What lame-ass conversation was I going to have, that the horoscope Gods suggested that I should take a mental vacation during it?

I guess the better question is, who was I to have this tedious discussion with? I had a feeling it wasn’t my husband. We have been married fourteen years and are about ten years past the big discussion phase of our relationship. We are more at the ‘Who’s cooking dinner?’ and “For the love of God, why can’t you ever remember to refill the filtered water pitcher’ era of our conversations.

So that pretty much leaves one of my kids as the discusser and me as the discussee. At first I thought it was going to be with my twelve year old daughter, but she was too busy stalking One Direction on her I pod to chat about anything with me. Anyways, her idea of dialogue lately involves a lot of eye rolling and telling me about all the things that she thinks were stupid. I made a mental note to check back in with her after high school and went in search of a less hormonally challenged child.

I decided to ask my seven year old son if he would like to have a discussion with me. He can always be counted on for his interesting take on life. He, true to form, had a diatribe at the ready. The subject was one of great importance. Why are all Star Wars Lego kits so big, and more importantly, how was he going to get one.

A very thought provoking question, indeed.

I suggested that I could sell our house so I could afford to buy him one of the exorbitantly priced toys, but that presented the problem of having no where to keep his Lego kits once he was done building them.

During our conversation, my mind didn’t drift off once. Probably because talking with him is much more interesting than speaking with most adults. I’m more likely to let my mind wander during a mature discussion where someone utters the words ‘Romney’ or ‘Obama’. To be honest, I would much rather talk about the dilemma of choosing between a Star Wars or a Harry Potter Lego kit or whether to forgo building blocks altogether for a purchase of a Power Ranger.

There is no way your mind can wander while watching an episode of the Power Rangers, not with an explosion every few minutes and creepy Nyloks crawling around. Maybe if they would have set off explosions behind Obama and Romney during their debate, I would have watched tuned in.

But I digress.

I asked my son later on in the day if he wanted to have another discussion, to which he answered that he wasn’t finished with our previous conversation about Legos. After a few minutes of closure on that subject, we moved onto an even more interesting topic: What would happen if cats took over the world. We both decided that under cat rule, dogs would be forced to dress like cats and everyone would have to use litter pans and eat fish.
Apparently, if dogs ruled, they would be much nicer than cats and would simply make humans their pets.

Now we are getting somewhere. I, for one, wouldn’t mind sleeping most of the day away, going for long walks, and having many belly rubs. The neutering, well, I don’t think most human males would agree to that.

Admit it though; wouldn’t you rather discuss the topic of animals ruling than politics?

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